Behaving Like Animals

Why is it we hoard in the wake of a storm.  On our recent snowy day I raced around buying up the town in a such frenzy a squirrel would be proud.  Today upon hearing of an impending storm, here I am again, I just finished "stocking up".  Don't ask me what I bought because most of it I can't justify.  Hmmm a new turkey platter, now that will come in handy when the power goes off.

Meeting of the Minds

I love this coffee shop!  There is a meeting of the minds in one corner talking wind farms, the life of Jesus and salmon fishing.  Another table playing a civilized game of crib and I'm knitting a shrug of many colors, which I'm frogging for the third time. Who needs TV.

On Knitting

My friend sent me this:
"In knitting as in life, we grow when we challenge ourselves.  The concentration required to learn a new stitch or technique is good for both our hands and our brains."
-Bev Galeskas

Finished!!

Annabella's Cowl Day Seven

This is  what happens everytime I sit and knit...
Only 3 more inches to go.

Annabella's Cowl Day Six

9 more inches...

Annabella's Cowl Day Five

This picture makes it look shorter I think, but there is progress being made...tomorrow it will travel with me to do Christmas visiting, and I will be doing some knitting.

Annabella's Cowl Day four

Slowly but surely...

Annabella's Cowl Day Three

It's coming right along...

Annabella's Cowl Day two

I have been knitting up a storm, almost half way there...

Annabella's Cowl Day one

Just a start...

Annabella's Cowl

When I was thinking about a gift for my Aunt D, I couldn't resist a piece everyone in my knitting group has knit and loved.  I've just started Annabella's Cowl by Annabella Serra.  I chose Hand Maiden's Sea Silk 70% silk blend with a strand of Rowan's Kidsilk haze Mohair/silk blend, for warmth, it's in it's infancy and already looks great.  It won't be finished for Christmas, so I decided to blog my progress, so she can see her gift growing as she waits.  I'm putting lots of love in this one as I go.  So stay tuned...

Hibernation

This is the time of year when I like to crawl into a hole and not come out until after New Years.  Merry Christmas!  Happy New Year!

Sheepdogs

Last night my friend and I traveled to Halifax to see "The Sheepdogs" perform.  Everyone I talk to say they've never heard of them, they are a great Canadian band, who have recently had some success, making it onto the cover of Rollingstone.  It was a sold out concert, standing room only, well there were no chairs.  That was a first for us, we perched ourselves on the balcony.  We had a great view, a people watching paradise.  Yukon Blonde, a Vancouver based band opened for them.  The Sheepdogs were true to form, CCR meets Lynyrd Skynyrd.  They totally looked the part, they are a bunch of hairy dudes!  We went wild when during the encore, Matt Mays jumped on stage to join in.  It was cool!!  We keep saying to ourselves that we are such lucky girls, this weekend we are staying close to home and enjoying some homegrown talent, The Hupman Brothers Band.  They have their CD release in Wolfville this Saturday.  It's so awesome to be surrounded by such talented people, right here where we live.  We are truly blessed!

Deadlines

Sometimes I wake up, and I think that I'm still in university and I've forgotten to go to class for a few months and I wonder if I'll fail, or do I have time to drop out before the deadline.  Deadlines...life's deadlines never seem to end, I set goals, organize my schedule, like failure is right around the bend if I don't go to the gym, clean the house, walk the dog, really? because in the end we all end up the same organic mulch, feeding worms in the ground six feet under, or ashes saved on the mantle until you're forgotten.

Jian Ghomeshi

Saturday night I traveled to Halifax to see Jian Ghomeshi, he is on a tour promoting his best-selling book "1982".  Jian is a CBC Radio host, he has a long list of other accomplishments, but I mostly admire his ability to bring Canadian culture to Canadians.  He has helped us realize our distinctive Canadian identity.  In my opinion Culture is the key to keeping us unified, it makes us who we are as a country, sets us apart from our more homogeneous neighbours in the world.  He is a very interesting character, very witty and charming.  It was nice to hear him speak with pride about being a Canadian and what that means to him.  His book isn't just about being from an immigrant family trying to fit in,  it's about the desire to belong.  A basic human need.  The book is presented in a way that would appeal to all ages.

The Unlikely Pilgrimage

I just finished reading, "The Unlikely Pilgrimage of Harold Fry" by Rachel Joyce.  What is it about first novels?  My favourite book sellers explanation is that it's been taking shape in a writers brain for so long before it's written, it's fully formed.  I like that explanation and I think that it is so true.  It was a wonderful book, about a journey that a seemingly ordinary man makes for reasons that become clearer to him and the reader the farther you get in the book.  The ending is perfect, like it was there all along, hidden between the lines.  I cried and laughed through out this book.  It's a book I've been looking for, needing to read for awhile, but I didn't realize it until I read the first chapter.  It reminded me of so many journeys I've made physically and figuratively.

What is the Reason?

I spent some time with friends today, it's Guy Fawkes night, which means a lot to my Newfoundland friends, and I was happy to share a bit of it with them.  It made me think about traditions.  My friends and I seem to be grasping on to our old traditions, resisting the urge to conform to the standards of today's materialistic societal values.   It's hard because I feel the need to conform, but am resisting so much almost too far in the other direction, skipping holidays I would have enjoyed as a younger person.  I've become jaded, by what I see around me.  It makes you question your own values, and what traditions you've kept from childhood, does it mean anything now? Is it worth it?  The expectations are sometimes overwhelming, especially if you're a women, whose duty it is to make your family happy.  Keeping things simple, makes you look like a failure these days in our commodity driven culture.  Where will it end?  But, I will try again this season to give Christmas some meaning. Wish me luck.

Love Anthony

I just finished a great book about Autism. " Love Anthony", by Lisa Genova.  It's about a child with Autism and how two women's lives become intertwined, unforgettably.  Autism has been something I've been interested in ever since I had a job caring for an autistic boy one summer.  It was before I finished my nursing degree.  I met him and his mother when I was doing a project on Autism and they were my case study.  He was an interesting little boy.  I learned a lot from him that summer.  He was somewhat of a mystery but also pretty straight forward, I knew when he was happy and I knew when he was sad.  There didn't seem to be a lot in between.  I think he liked hanging out with me, I certainly enjoyed hanging with him.  We went to the park, and swimming almost everyday that summer.  We often traded lunches, he would eat my brown bag lunch,  I would eat his ceaser salad, his mom thought it was his favorite, but my lunch always looked better to him.  He loved routine and so did I.  It was pretty peaceful with him, he didn't talk, I'm rather quiet by nature so we got a long fine. His world seemed so much simpler than mine, I thought.  Even though I've cared for 100's of people over the past 13 years he was special in my heart, taking care of him grounded me and I think about him all the time.

Red Tide

Here's one for my writing group, miss you guys, see you soon.

Poisoned air, She manipulated into silence.
Silence, that takes no prisoners.
It permeates the walls,
It hangs like cobwebs in the corners of the room, nagging us, while we sit and wait for the air to clear,
The fog to lift,
The time to pass,
Enough for it to let go of the hold it has on us.

War Story

I'm sitting having a tea at my coffee shop and reviewing some of the comments from my  "Facebook Rant".  Thanks everyone I love getting comments.

An older gentleman sitting next to me is having coffee with friends.  He is a story teller by nature and everyone around is a welcome audience.  He is reciting a story of the Second World War,  his story.  He must have been just old enough to join up at the time.  A story that has been told before.  His world view at 18 probably is different now, it changed in a moments time, on a battlefield somewhere far away from home.  Now his stories are funny, bring a smile to people who listen.  I can see him as a young man, a little less sure of himself than he is now.  These first hand accounts of that time are few now.  I feel fortunate to hear him speak.  Unfortunately, there are too many war stories, that will never die because people live them now, everyday in other places.  We can see them on the news, every time we turn on the TV, or follow a newsfeed online.  One of the reasons I've given up on the visual news media,  it's too vivid, too real.  I feel too helpless.  We have so much freedom in our part of the world,  we should take a moment and think about that.

Friends

I have to say something about Facebook and how it's degrading what the word "friend" truly is.  It is another opportunity for stalkers to stalk, gossipers  to gossip , and malingers to malinger.  We are being sold something on that site and we are't even aware of it. It's a total time waster, and time we can't get back.  People are living online instead of real life. They are playing another virtual game, living a lie.  What got me started on this rant is I was researching a story that I'm writing and so I've been reading suicide notes, including some on Facebook and You tube.  It was sad that the only connection those poor people had to the world was Facebook and what makes us so different from them,  we all are trying to find human contact, in my opinion we are looking in the wrong spot for fulfillment.  It wasn't enough for those poor souls who decided that this life wasn't worth living. Why is it enough for us? We deserve better than that,  we need more than that, we are human after all.   I don't feel  most people are connecting through Facebook I think it only allows for an excuse to not connect, like with a click of the mouse, we can ward off loneliness,  keeping love and friendship at arms length, to disconnect from the guilt we feel when we don't have time to see people or get to have a conversation with those we haven't talked to in awhile.  As for the good it has done, I'm happy lost people are found and important information gets to where it needs to go. But it's sad when all we have to offer our "Friends" is a status update that says,   " I'm sooo bored" or "the cat peed on the floor again" , both of these quotes are from the website  www.cracked.com , they have compiled" The Top Ten worst Facebook Status Updates",  who needs to know that your cat peed, you are at the gym, or sleeping...  Really?  Human beings require meaningful connections,  to be happy.   

I'm just saying... time will tell the cracks will begin to show.

The End

Fallen Leaves

I wish I could collect fallen leaves,
Like I did when I was five,
They were beautiful to me,
I collected one of every shape and Colour,
Just to be fair.
I wanted to save them, give them a home that was warm, and dry.
I thought they would stay alive forever,
If I cared enough.
But like everything,
Their beauty faded,
Dried up, cracked, turned to dust.
I didn't understand like I do now.
Trying to keep something alive that is dead is futile.
Now their beauty reminds me of the fragility of life.

Dawn

The Face of Beauty

I sat and stared into the face of a dragonfly today, I wondered what it was thinking landing on my arm, did I look like an inviting flower or leaf? Can it think, could it feel, see my smile, and understand how it made my day.  Did I detect a feeling of contentment.  It landed on me because I was quietly soaking up the sun, being still.  Something it admires, I imagined. We looked at each other inquisitively for awhile, enjoying the sunny day, then it flew away.

The Face of Fear

Once I was in a dimly lit room at a hospital where I worked,

at my patients' bedside I was presented with a hostile, sneering, face.  Not all-together unusual depending on the day but after a few comments about not paying taxes and what a great job I was GIVEN.  I knew  what he meant.  The light change and he realized I wasn't a native woman, it was me his white nurse.  He looked embarrassed I won't go so far as to say ashamed.   I had to ignore the feeling in my chest, that heavy feeling that fear creates.  I've never felt such hatred.  It permeated from him, it weakened me, but I carried on like it didn't happen with a fake smile, giving him the respect he hadn't earned.  Imagine feeling that much hatred everyday.  I felt it for a minute and I can't forget it.  That minute changed me.

Empty

Souls,
Torn,worn,
Patched, and mended.

Bears the weight of silence,
In it's weakened state,
Fear moves in
Like a silent disease,
It's too weak to fight.

The cracks grow visible,
It's leaking, weeping.
Fading
Empty

Kansas City Cowl

Finished!

Coming alive

So I'm sitting and knitting and having a tea at my coffee shop.  I'm watching Main Street wake up.  I haven't done that in awhile, it's really very fascinating, I arrived when the sidewalk cleaner was picking up refuge left behind by the Saturday night revellers.  The town seems to wake up at the same time.  It's surprising who is up early on a Sunday.  A few students weighted down with backpacks full of books,  meeting to study and there are a lot of paper reading, CBC radio listening,  political "expert" types meeting for coffee, black, no sugar.  When I arrived the morning radio was talking about the controversy surrounding legalizing selling organs(the ones needed to extend life) Wow, that was pretty deep.   I overheard one of the students was up late until 2:30 "making soup", I wonder if that's code for something....The mocha latte drinking group come and go.  The noise level increases as the mom's and tots arrive, the future of my coffee shop is in their hands, so adorable, eating an oatcake, there is hope.

The Clock Of Heaven

So, I've had my nose stuck in a book.  I found it in a little neighborhood bookstore, a local author.  "The Clock of Heaven" by Dian Day.  The book seller seemed underwhelmed by it, but something about it intrigued me.  It's about a women with a sad past and a precarious future, who is searching for a "safe haven" and is surprised when she finds kindness amongst strangers.  The author must be a poet, every line was beautiful.  It's a short book but the story seems complete, and in the short time it took me to finish it, it made me sad, happy, surprised and totally enamored.  I wept at a certain point and really couldn't remember when I had last read a book that evoked such emotion in me.  Not many books can do that in 400 pages, this book is 210 pages.  I think a book without a lot of fluff is so much more powerful,  it lets you think, imagine, and grow with the characters as they develop on the page.  If it's weighed down with too much stuff, the essence  of the story gets lost.  I recommend it to everyone.

Zen

So, I'm sitting and knitting in that perfect zen state,  sitting in "my" coffee shop.  There is as certain  atmosphere here and it is very conducive to my thinking, creative brain.  The "people watching" is very interesting. A local artist is sitting across from me, creating something beautiful,  there's a meeting of the minds over by the window and a man deep in a novel next to me.  The coffee guy sings as he works and an array students rush in and out.  Being in a university town sends me back to my university days, with a smile.  Oh and, My tea is made with actual tea leaves.  What more could a girl want.  A few simple things and my day is transformed into an event worth writing about, gotta love it.  I stopped at the wool shop to tell them about the chance encounter with some of their flock at Louisbourg, I couldn't resist picking up some heavenly alpaca, and a hat pattern.  One for me and one for my husband.  What a lucky man.  My "Kansas city" cowl is almost finished and I'm so pleased with how it turned out.  I will post a picture when it is completed.

Louisbourg Day Five

My last day at Louisbourg just makes me want to return next year.  It was only a half a day for me because I drove home today also.  6.5 hours!!  I'm always a little sad to leave, the peacefulness of that place.  Being a little part of the magic, that's what it's about.  Holding bits of history in my hands, it's why I have to keep going back.  Thanks everyone!!!

Louisbourg Day Four

It was another amazing day at Louisbourg.  One day left.  The week went really fast.  Everyday I've learned something new.  I love that!  So I've decided the weirdest place I've knit is now Louisbourg beside the sheep munching away while we wait for word to commence digging, from the archaeologist.  It seemed like a very natural thing to be doing actually.  I did get my photo taken and apparently I'll be famous on Facebook.  Or infamous whatever the case may be.

Here are some more photos.

Louisbourg Day Three

 All hands on deck, there was a lot of louisbourg earth sifted through today.

 A buckle was found along with pieces of pottery, glass, iron, and animal bone.

A brave guard on duty, perched atop the gate.

Another beautiful day spent at Louisbourg.  I did some digging today,  processed artifacts,  walked the ruins trail, which is a really interesting walk around the site where there are remenants of foudations.  The yummy raspberries I picked on the way was a bonus.  I visited the sites where we were excavating a couple years ago.  One of my favorite spots at Rochefort Point.  There is a whole different feel there,  quiet, peaceful,  all you can hear are waves crashing against the shore.  

Louisbourg Day Two

It was another great day.  I spent most of the day in the field lab washing, and labeling artifacts.  It's my favorite part.  I get to see what they found last week and examine all the pieces up close.  Here are some pictures.  There are also pictures on their Facebook site.


These are pipe stems, all the sites have been littered with them,  it was a favorite pastime.

 I love putting the Provenience label on each piece, we use a quill pen and acrylic ink.

 The Boat Builder on site is a very talented young guy.  Here are some of his tools, the wooden planers he actually made himself.   It's pretty neat!  His goal is to build a boat that was used in Louisbourg during it's time.  I check in to see his progress regularly.

If anyone is interested in the public program the info is on the park website.  I'm amazed every year, of all the great people that work here.  This year a little sad because of the cuts to funding for Parks Canada.  Understanding our history makes us stronger and our Culture makes us human,  civilized.  Why can't they see how important it is?  Everyone should be speaking out!!  We're in Canada,  not some under privileged nation.  That's my rant.  The End.

Louisbourg Day One

 My first glimpse...

 Treasure!!

The excavation site from last week. 

Treasure

So I'm sitting, drinking a steamer.  Waiting for lunch hour so I can eat at my fav lunch spot.  I'm working all evening shifts this week,  then I'm on vacation for 8 days.  Yippee!  My vacation has been the same for the past 4 years.  I'm a creature of habit, well aren't we all really?  I travel to Louisbourg, Cape Breton every August to join an archaeology program, it's a public program, that anyone can do.  My volunteer vacation. My goal this year is to try to contribute as much as I can as payment for everything  I've learned from them.  I've felt very privileged to be around the crew they have there, such a wealth of knowledge.  You know what the best part is?  As soon as I drive into that little town and see the fortress across the water my shoulders relax, I exhale, and a smile blooms on my face.  It's pretty cool.

What I've Been Doing...

I Finished my Teva Durham "Openwork Cardigan"

A Tea Party, with the new teacup from my friend D

Started a new project "Lace Rib Shrug" by Dawn Leeseman

 Finished my "Balm to the Soul" Shawlette by Jaala Spiro

Working on "La Paloma" by Sebastian Iradier

                                   

Sharing

So lately I have been feeling rather grateful of the things I have, we've recently bought a farm share.  Organic mostly or as close to it as they can get.  Eating what's in season and not just what we fancy is a challenge.  How many ways can you eat a radish?  Anyway I love it.  I go every week to pick up our boxes it feels like Christmas.  Sometimes I peek and look online at our list of goodies sometimes I leave it as a surprise.  Our valley is so plentiful, it's a shame to go to the grocery store there are so many farmers, and producers of whatever you could want right here.  We even have a local dairy.  It's given me motivation to try some new recipes.  Our share farmer is so organized we get some recipes on our newsletter every week.  It's pretty simple stuff.  We always seem to make things so complicated these days.  Like nothing is worthwhile unless it's traveled 1000km's to get here and left a massive footprint behind it.  I though we were suppose to be an intelligent animal.  Makes you wonder.

On Growing Up and Knitting

Coffee shop post
So I'm sitting and knitting.  Sometimes I do stand, a little more challenging.  A little silly at my coffee shop, but perfectly acceptable at my knitting group.  Anyway I was thinking about how a new project takes awhile to get to know. The intimate details of how the yarn will knit up is a bit of a mystery sometimes especially if you like to change the pattern a bit like I do.  I find you have to spend some time with it to get the flow.  That of course got me thinking of an analogy.  Knitting is like growing up.  You need to make a few mistakes to understand what you're all about. So back to knitting I realized after undoing my work for the third time, I now have the patience for pulling out my work.  I have developed the fortitude to withstand the humiliation of a mistake.  Does that mean I finally have grown up?  Hmmmmmm.

My tuesday night knitting group was last night.  Even though I was only there for a short time and only knit 4 rows,  it feels great to hang out with the like minded,  all creating something beautiful together.   They are a pretty special group of women and men, all from different backgrounds all supportive and caring.  It's more like a support group, but very positive.  Where we knit we are surrounded by a rainbow of fibres.  Last night I saw some Canadian Bison yarn.  Cool.

The Spontaneity of Life

On reflection I had a wonderful birthday. At the cafe as I was perusing the local newsletter there was an advertisement for an acoustic festival held nearby. I ended up spending the rest of the day listening to beautiful music and some of the best guitar players in Canada. I felt priviledged to be a part of it. It totally inspired me to play my guitar, not practice, just play, I'll be doing that later. Right now I'm sitting in front of the fountain in the beautiful botanical gardens. Eating my picnic lunch. Better still there is an herb fair today, I had no idea, I'm such a lucky girl:)

Our Wounded Souls

My conversation with my friend "the hero" the other day stayed with me, as do many charged up conversations, it nagged me so I wrote a poem to exorcise the demon.

Our Wounded Souls

Like a leaky tap it nagged.

We ignored it.

What a mess we have to clean up,

Empty souls needing refills.

--Love Dawn

On a Positive Note...

So today is my birthday. I'm off today, I have the entire day to myself everyone else I'd share it with is working or far away. I'm planning on a day of revitalization. Familiar haunts. It's nice to see people you know and who know you. First off the local farmers' market. I'm always inspired by other creative people in my community. I seem to absorb their positive vibes. It gives me energy. I've come to realize negative or emotionally charged people, places, and things drain me. Yes even places and things. There is energy held in places and things. It may be the feelings some things evoke but however it happens, it happens. I've been avoiding negativity for a few years now, I've been able to be so much more creative. My other plans on this special day is lunch at my favorite cafe and a walk at the beautiful botanical gardens at the university near by. I like walking on campus it reminds me of my university days, much simpler days, I just didn't know it then. The cafe I haunt is a small operation owned and operated by energetic young people. The food is made from local produce. It's a business with a conscious. Not the trendy kind of conscious, the real kind. It's cash only. The patrons are loyal, I can sit and knit while I wait and no one bats an eyelash. It's called "The Rolled Oat". It's a little place with a lot of heart. That's the plan, it's going to be a great day...

For The Love Of Music

I went to a Blues music festival this weekend, it was local and I'm amazing at the talent just in our own backyard. A music festival is a interesting place for a "people watcher" like me. Gathering in a place to listen to music is unifying, you strike up conversations with people you may not normally speak to. Everyone is usually very courteous and kind. There was a positive vibe at this one. One of the entertainers offered his talent for free, and came from NFLD just to be a part of it. I think we should feel very lucky we live in a place that allows the freedom to gather like that. The connection you feel in a crowd of like-minded music-loving individuals is like no other. It's a connection at a basic human level we aren't accustom to in our individualistic society these days. I'm looking forward to next year, maybe I'll see you there.

The Color of Contentment

I've started a new knitting project.  "Openwork Cardigan" by Teva Durham.  The perfect summer sweater.  It's navy blue.  It's my fourth blue sweater...I guess I have a thing for blues.  That got me thinking...ever notice how different stages of your life involve colors.  In highschool boring beige.  During university it was black,  not goth, just black.  I think I wore it because it was a time of transition, there's so much to learn at that age, black is easy.  As time passed and I learned who I was, the colors became brighter happier.  Now I rarely wear black,  navy blue is the closest I get to black most days.  Red, Purple,Orange... is how I feel these days.

My Garden

Cucumbers!

Cortland or Delicious? 

I love that color!!

Tomatoes and carrots, oh my!

Marigolds are suppose to be good pest repellants.

My rose with a little friend.

Growing

So I'm sitting and knitting, on my swing in the backyard. Thinking about my growing garden. I actually grew a rose this week. It was the first time I've been successful. I gave all my roses to a dear friend in the fall because I hated to see them not meeting their full potential. I checked on them a little while ago and they seem very happy in her garden. I kept a bush that my aunt and uncle had given me as a housewarming present. This year it bloomed! I'm posting pictures as proof. Along with a few other from my backyard vegetable garden.

Random Acts of Kindness

I was getting gas last week and was surprised to find two ladies performing acts of kindness. They gave me 5 dollars towards my gas and washed my windows. They looked really happy doing it. I was in shock really. We do live in a kind society compared to others I won't mention. It still impresses me when people are kind for no personal gain. I think we don't teach our children this enough perhaps. Life isn't about personal gain, but our relationships with others is what gives us joy, we are human after all. I learned this early on in my life. I'm proud to say I have an Aunt and Uncle who have always been keen givers. I always thought it was cool when I would receive a little note at Christmas that I helped to feed a family. It made me become a volunteer and probably decided my career path. I have become discouraged with the human race lately with their seemingly lack of concern for their neighbors and endless greed, but little things like the two ladies last week give me hope. I'm saving my 5 dollars to pass on, keep the kindness going. Cheers!

I always try to remember...

"People may not remember exactly what you did, or what you said, but they will always remember how you made them feel" Unknown

Thinking Roads

There are some roads in this beautiful valley I live in that I like to call my thinking roads. You know the routes that are familiar, scenic, and allow for a little thinking. These are the roads I drove today. My day of lunches and visiting, was great. The day was filled with beautiful gardens, soul food, and walks on the beach hunting for rocks with my mom, sister, and little neices. The old road to visit my mother always gets me thinking. Memories of previous visits and summer vacations, flood my mind. Happy times spent traveling in the car. Peaceful and quiet. Today, alone with just the radio, I felt like I could solves all the worlds problems, not only my own. It was a grand day! Thanks everyone!

Onward and upward

Well, I survived. I'm moving on. Onward and upward, as they say. The past few days were filled with "goodbyes", "nice working with you" and a bunch of "you'll be back"'s. My agenda for today was a little skewed, in between piano and guitar lessons (yes I'm crazy), and laundry. My husband enlisted my help as a carpenters helper on our patio reno. My plan to knit tiny bears for my nieces are being put off. I'll be up later frantically making bears ears and tails. They are tiny so it shouldn't be too bad. I'm off galavanting tomorrow to lunch with two of my favorite gals and my mom and sister with my nieces in tow will be meeting me for supper farther down the way. I hope it's fine but my garden needs the rain. Until next time...

Countdown

So in 8 days I start my new job. Countdown is on. It's early Sunday morning, too early. This time of morning before the birds get up it feels wrong to be awake. My mind is working overtime, my grandmother would get up and bake cookies. I never could understand that. Maybe this morning I do. When your mind is in overdrive you need distraction. Yesterday I was in recovery mode, recovering from friday at work. I watched mindless TV and knit. Knitting is therapy for me. Seeing the pattern develop into form is pretty cool. It's creative and meditative all at the same time. I'm such a multi-tasker! I'm up now because my fog has finally lifted and my brain is functioning at full capacity. Just in time for another mind-numbing three days. I feel I need a cheering squad behind me the next three days, I should have told my co-workers to bring their pompoms.

Listen

You can hear people when they aren't there you just have to listen.

Reflections

Funny how just one cup of commitment can cause a avalanche of reflection. So it's story time... I met an extraordinary women once through the work that I do, she was living with the big C but death was always lurking.  She had an wonderful attitude.  Something that I admire, strong and brave.  That pick up and carry on attitude you don't encounter that often.  She explained to me once that she had always wanted a tattoo but never got around to it until she was  diagnosed in her 50's. So she had angel wings tattooed on her back.  Life size and beautiful.  For the world to see.  Very appropriate.  It effected me,  I've always been fascinated by tattoos and did brand myself at age 19.  So decided this time it had to mean something more than just a youthful rite of passage.   On my travels to Europe when I was in my 20's I toured Amsterdam and Anne Frank's annex.  Had an epiphany while walking through,  things became clearer to me after that.  My world view changed just a little.  I loved the quote from her book.  "Where there is hope there is life"... Hope is an essential theme in my life and work.  The quote also makes me think of being exiled, trapped in a life beyond your control but making a life inspite of it all.  So that's what I did I tattooed myself with that quote and a butterfly to signify freedom and growth.  It lives with me now, a constant reminder of those women who are strong and brave, fighting for life until the end.

Saying goodbye

So today I'm saying goodbye to people I've worked with for 12 years. We've shared laughs, frustrations, and fears. Losses, loves, and tears. It's just time to move on. Pick up and carry on. Open a new chapter...Goodbye everyone. Thanks!

Things you learn by by just sitting and knitting

It's hard to believe that just sitting and knitting can become a profound experience. I guess it's because the act of knitting kind of creates a zen-like, meditative, focus. I know sounds a little like crazy, but it is what it is. So, I was sitting in another coffee shop, that place where people go to hmmmmm, drink coffee... Anyway I'm reading my horoscope, which I don't normally do, but the topic was courage and I needed it. It was a simple quote, by Fernand Pouillon, he said, "Courage lies in being oneself, in showing complete independence, in loving what one loves, in discovering the deep roots of one's feelings." at that moment I needed to read those words. So I knit and sipped my vanilla steamer:) and the words ruminated in my head. The words created a bit of peace in there.